Its all crashing down. You are tossed out. Lighting strikes. The crown tumbles. Clouds, darkness, lightning, fire and ice.
When the tower shows up in your life, when you experience the ground shift underneath you and you are left with unexpected loss, change, or abandonment, it can be awful. Sometimes the first thing that happens is the child in you comes out. You can react with fear, with self judgment, self blame, and yes… self pity.
Its a tough card. Its frightening. I am ashamed that it is easier for me to counsel others going through this than it is myself. But it is the truth of the matter. Beyond all the ego, beyond all the fear, there really is growth. There is the chance to rebuild your foundation stronger, sturdier, and with a conscious solidity.
A breakup is a perfect example of The Tower showing up in your life. Sometimes we build things up, we make assumptions about the way things are, we have years of building our relationship, brick by brick. But maybe we didn’t properly kiln dry all the bricks. Maybe we didnt notice and take care of the weaknesses, the cracks. So while we saw the strong, tall tower, we ignored the weaknesses. Or avoided. Or weren’t observant enough. Or they may have even been hidden from us. And the truth is, it doesn’t matter. Those ‘whys’, those ‘what ifs’, those ‘if onlys’ exist in the past now. The tower has crumbled. It is what it is.
So you sit in the rubble. With the loss, with the grief, with the pain. Go ahead and do it. You need to.
We humans are builders. We are creators. We cannot avoid moving forward. And so move forward, we do. And it is the intent with which we move forward is what is important. And each new day is an opportunity to build a better foundation for ourselves. To dream of what we want to do differently. The fallen tower allows us to recreate ourselves. Make different choices. Use what we have learned to become better people.
And that is where we have space to create the most amazing future possible. Hold on. It gets better. You will be stronger. Life will be beautiful when the storm clears…