If Not Now, When?

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Someone I know and dearly love gave me a wakeup call once, years ago.

She was in her late 50’s, smart, educated, strong, admirable. I always looked up to her (I still do). But she once said something that changed my life forever.

It was a small part of a random conversation. Just a tiny bit of shared information. But it winded up informing my decisions from there on out.

“I’m still feeling like I am waiting for my life to begin.”

To hear that from a woman whom I thought had it all together in terms of what she had done with her life, slew me, shocked me, awakened me.

Do we want to keep waiting, or do we want our life? Now? Now is all we have and we waste it so easily. By worrying about the future. By feeling guilty about the past. By just not accepting the here and now.

When I coach clients, I hear so much of this. “If only”, “If I hadn’t”, “If xyz were different”…

But we are here and now. It is what we have got to work with, and its a pretty damn amazing thing to work with, really! When we get coached, it allows us to connect with the fullness of now. It allows us to get our perspective back, have choice in the matter, get enough clarity that we can see the ‘now’ and choose how we want to show up in it.

The things that stop us, cost us. They cost us this very moment.

Be unstoppable.

Anxiety and The Hanged Man

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Anxiety. It sucks. That’s all there is too it.  When we get caught up in it, it can take over our world. Anxiety can affect every aspect of our lives.

The problem is, is that it is a vicious cycle. The more you have anxiety, the more your anxious brain creates reasons to  be anxious.

This is where The Hanged Man comes in. “Let go, and let be” is a wonderful way to look at this card. When you are trussed up with so much that is beyond your control, relaxing and letting go will often allow you to see things in a different perspective. Just like hanging upside down shows you the world in a whole new context.

When things are overwhelming, you can either spiral up with all the overwhelm, or you can just let go. Let it be. Allow knowledge to come to you.

That being said, we all know that “letting go and letting be” is the absolute hardest thing in the world to do. But once we have knowledge, once we can tap into ‘why’, we can sit and process with much more ease.

When you can look at your anxious moments through the cards, that awareness will help give you a space to rest. And when your anxiety can rest, it can recede. And when it can recede, solutions, results and actions can come take its place.

And then you can move forward powerfully.

Then you can create your world.

Then it becomes awesome…

This is one of the ways we can work together with the Reflective Tarot Coaching process to create solutions, so you can move past whatever is stopping you and move forward to an amazing life.

If you are ready, let’s book a session together!

 

I Saw the House of the Hermit Last Night.

 

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I took a walk in the darkness last night.

There was a light midway up the black night of mountain.

A new light. Amber. Homey. Warm.

I had never seen it before, and thought, “that is where I would like to live.” Slowly, as I kept walking, the light slowly, slowly disappeared into nothingness. I could see no place on the mountain.  It was dark. Black.

It was a momentary gift. The Hermit stepped out of his cave of reflection to shine a light for me. Maybe an invitation to go in.

Go in to the cave. Be quiet in the light of a single lamp.

Listen.

The only way we are going to hear ourselves is if we listen.

The only way we are going to listen is if we are not distracted.

The only way we are not going to be distracted is if we go in to our cave.

And listen.

Listen in our dark. Listen in our silence. Listen to what is deep and hidden.

There is our voice.

In the darkness. In the cave of the mountain.

Our voice is that beautiful amber light. It will light up the worlds darkness. It will be a beacon.

But we need to hear it first.

That’s what The Hermit tells us…

 

 

(Hermit card again from the amazing Wild Unknown Tarot Deck)

A Powerful New Year!

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It’s a new year! New growth. New opportunities. New possibilities.

I choose a card for the new year. Consciously.  I wanted to be conscious in my choice as I want you to remember that whatever happens, whatever shows up in your world, you still have choice. You still have your own power in how you want to see, to be, in the world. And, by taking on choice, you create your world. You create the world.

We are that powerful. As long as we remember it.

And so I choose the Ten of Cups. Specifically from The Wild Unknown Deck.

It is simple. And in its simplicity it all comes together. Coming together is what this year is about. If we all gather together, if we all create change, both within ourselves and without, that is where the love is. That is where the joy is. That is where the happiness is.

That is where the strength truly resides.

This is what I wish for us to take on this year.

It is time for us to make it all come together.

 

 

 

Reflective Tarot Coaching, it’s About What YOU See…

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I believe you know it all.

Well, I believe you have the ability to know it all. What is best for you, what you need, what you desire, what you want to bring to the world.

It is all in there, somewhere. Maybe on the surface. Maybe hidden.

When you shine your own light on your situation is when you will find what you need.  That is the wonderful thing about tarot coaching. The cards come up as they do, but, really, that means nothing. What is important is what YOU see in them.

Look at the cards above. What stands out? What makes you excited? What makes you turn away? For each and every one of us, these will show up differently. Tarot uses the archetypes of our universal, human journey, but, while we are all on that path, it is going to be different for all of us. We are all special snowflakes and exactly the same at the very same time.

A tarot coach is just your guide. We are not here to tell you what to do. We are not here to give you advice. We are here to reflect your own journey back at you. We trust you to connect the dots and do the work. Even if it doesn’t seem like it, even if it is buried under layers and layers of ‘stuff’, you are the expert in your own life.

We are just here to help peel it back so you can move forward!

Who Cares What Happened When You Were Four?

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When I was four. I killed my sister’s dog. She was tiny. I made her go down some stairs that she couldn’t manage. She fell and died.

I was four. I think. Somewhere around there. But that doesn’t matter. I killed a dog. It became who I was. The guilt, shame, loss, all became my identity. I have no memory of what my family did. I don’t remember how I reacted. All I knew is I was someone who killed a dog. And that person is bad. And so I was bad.

We all have moments in our childhood that define us. We may not even have a memory of them. And, logically, you think, ‘well, it just happened once, why is it so important?’

Yes, a defining event may have happened only once. But we forget that we add 10, 20, 30, 40 years of reinforcement to that event. It’s not direct. It’s not on purpose. It is not something we are even aware of. But it changes our point of view. The perspective that all other acts are seen from. The filter on our lens has names like: bad, selfish, undeserving, unworthy. And that becomes from where we act for the rest of our lives if we don’t catch it. If we don’t consciously change that perspective.

As a child, unless you have a fabulous other human next to you to help you process an event, you just don’t have the ability to do it for yourself. Therefore events stay unprocessed. They stay as a definition of our identity.

As adults we get to change that. That change can show up in many forms: therapy, meditation, a profound book, yes, tarot coaching 🙂 , a conversation with a friend. (Landmark is fabulous for this, btw)

When I was younger, I found the idea of those memories defining us ridiculous. Only when I started to see how everything got changed, how everything was compounded by future action, did I start to get it. I got how I made an event mean something about me, then I carried that definition for 40 years. It’s that important. And letting go is even more important.

It’s work that has to be done. It is too difficult to live your life from the standpoint of undeserving, unworthy, etc. For joy and abundance to show up, truly, the best way to get there is change your lens filter, change your viewpoint, turn around and move forward from a place of deserving and worthiness.

 

(Yes, this is the second or third time I have written about this. It is that important for me to remember and stay present to…)

 

Quiet Balance

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Quiet.

Silence.

Recovery.

Rest makes whole.

We cannot move forward if we are not whole.

And yet, we try.

Every day.

Over and over again.

Push, force, coerce. Just a little bit more energy. Just a little bit more effort. Caffeine, sugar. Have to. Need to.

That works.

For a while.

Until you break.

Rest. Recover. Sleep. Be.

These all have a purpose. To make us whole again. Yet we don’t seem to believe it or allow it. Or trust it. Science backs it up. All of nature backs it up. So what is our problem?

Stop.

Listen.

Breathe.

Your days will fill with health. Energy.

Things will happen. Your will be more productive. You will get more done. Easily, unforced, without coercion.

And you will win the battle.

 

Imagery, The Tarot, and Reflective Readings

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Images. They all tap in to our psyche. They all show up for us in different ways.

Images are symbols. We can just say, ‘oh, this symbol means…’, but when we actually look at an image, there is a different pathway being activated, and that resonates personally, and quite individually. Think of being told about a painting and studying just the facts surrounding it, or getting to actually sit and be present with a painting. the deconstruction into meaning will not compare to the actual experience.

Symbols abound in tarot. It can be argued that it is all symbol. But personal reactions to visual stimuli can be different. For example, we can talk all day long about the symbology, history, social implications of the color red, but to actually, visually, experience the color is a whole different thing. The experience may not align with certain elements of known symbology, etc. It may make one person cry, it may make another angry.

This is where tarot is most powerful. When it speaks to to each individual’s personal experience, and does not just live as a symbol alone. When image is connected to viewer is when the magic happens.

With Reflective Tarot Coaching, it is all about what the client sees. There is a trust that they will see exactly what they need to. And, really, you are the expert in and of your own life. As a reader, I do not get in the way of that with my own advice, because there is really no need to. Yes, meanings, archetypes, symbols all come into play, but the biggest, most important, most powerful element, is what YOU see.

Celebration IS the Point.

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Just celebrate already! It’s life. It’s beautiful. It’ is rich and deep and profound and moving. It is dark and light. We can dwell in the dark, sure. But if we are not celebrating the light, well. what is the point?

Have the Three of Cups show up for you every day. Dance. Sing. Hug friends. Take a bath. I don’t know how it shows up for you, this celebration. I don’t know what is going to bring you the most joy. It is your choice. It is yours to decide from everything out there.

There is no meaning to life if we don’t honor it, play with it, love it. All the cliches apply: Life is a gift, you only live once, you don’t know what tomorrow will bring, so live fully today. The list goes wonderfully on and on. That’s because there is so much truth there.

We often wait for the opportune moment to celebrate. But according to who? I remember being in a seminar with a few hundred wonderful people. We were all standing up, taking turns stating what we wanted to take on in life. People were mentioning writing books, getting a better job, finding a deeper relationship with their partner, etc. All wonderful, fabulous intentions. Then this one guy:

He stood up and stated that he wanted to take on having the most fun possible. He just wanted to party and do fun things and live in joy every day.

It was pretty awesome. It was years ago. And he is the only one whose specific intention I remember. Although I do remember the whole room supporting him in this amazing choice in life. That was who he was. And it made us all happier knowing that there is this one guy out there that is just going to have some damn fun.

I hope he is partying today…

 

(And, yes, that is me a few years ago. It feels a bit awkward to add in my own picture, but you know what? There is nothing celebratory about feeling awkward, so I am doing it anyway… 🙂 )

Releasing Yourself From Bondage. Eight of Swords.

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There is no greater bondage than what we create for ourselves. We make choices that blind us, that bind us. We go through life not thinking, not looking. Then, all of a sudden, we are restricted and wonder how we ever got that way. Who put these blinders on? Who set up these dangerous swords around us?

Slowly, subtly. We allow ourselves to be bound without awareness. We don’t notice it, we are not present to it. That is understandable. As these restrictions creep up on us, they can be hidden, they can be so out in the open that it is almost too obvious.

Our arms are ties, our eyes are shut, we are so worried about any misstep that we don’t make the attempt to step forward at all. This can come from trying to ‘be’ a certain way, trying to please others, trying to be how we ‘should’ be. It is a long list. And the list becomes more important than our freedom. So we stay bound.

But how is that any way to live? How is that going to bring your own personal awesomeness to the world? How is it going to change the world? It’s not.

How do you rip off that blindfold? Well, that blindfold can be seen as a positive. What if you did not have to look at all those swords of ‘shoulds’? You could look in, you could connect with self. You can find your center. And from your center, from who you truly are, you can move forward in your own strength.

Hella lot better than trying to please everyone else.